AMBIENT THOUGHT – Episode Fifteen

The following and all of the other episodes to come are snapshots of what goes on in my head, now and in the past. There are times none of this will make sense. There will be times when I might get lucky and the blog I post will be well constructed and will flow like a mountain stream to an awaiting lake below. Other times it will seem like the ramblings of a madman and you’ll ask yourself, “What the……?”
You should probably get use to the latter.

EPISODE FIFTEEN:  It’s The End Of The World. Who Cares?

end of the world this one-1_edited-1

Do you like disaster movies?

I LOVE them. I mean, I really, really love them. They are my favorite film genre by a mile. Even when I was a kid, I was enthralled by watching disaster films about buildings, planes, ships and about the destruction of cities and the whole world.

Those were my favorite disaster films. When whole cities or the world was on the verge of destruction or destroyed, you couldn’t pull me away from the TV. When I was young, I had no reason to love those movies.

And when I got older, they became more fascinating. It doesn’t matter if the world is getting destroyed by asteroids, meteors, plagues, zombies (walkers) or even a killer breeze from the plants and trees (see The Happening), I could not take my eyes off of the screen.

Now the question I have asked myself and the one you may be asking…


It’s taken me a few years but I figured it out.

There is a part of me (sometimes more, sometimes less) that wants it to happen.


Honestly, more or less. Actually, the world as we know it.

Understand, I don’t want the planet Earth to explode and turn into dust and we are all evaporated. That couldn’t be farther from the truth. I want to Earth to stay and the people, of course.

I’m looking for some chaos. I want the world to get shaken up a bit and to wake us up. Maybe something will come along and make us forget about the crap and cause us to focus on the important things.

And…I admit, if things turned into the real Walking Dead, the crap that usually makes me worry would be gone. Yes, there would be other things to worry about but there would be a sense of freedom, too.
Did you take me seriously? Did you really believe I want the world to end?

I really don’t. There might be a 5% part of me that says, “BOOM. Make it ALL go away!!”
But I’d hate to see that world. Always on the run. No safety.

And I have to think about my family. Because they are who I’m living for. I would hate for them to have to stop living and start surviving. That’s a horrible way to be.

I just think we have decided to care about the things that have no substance. We have decided to care about how others live their lives and not concentrating on our own lives. We decided to care about getting that next thing than taking time to spend with more important things, like family and friends. We have decided to fill our lives with non-substance than substance.

And I have been guilty of these things, too.

Maybe it’s that needs to change instead of waiting on others to. Maybe it’s that needs to change my world. Maybe it’s I that needs to have their world to end…just parts of it…and then to rebuild those parts…

Every morning I wake up, my world is full of potential. And instead of continuing to take the same road with the same ruts, I need to find a new way around and deal with what comes.

Sometimes, worlds need to be destroyed so it can rebuilt. Then use what you have learned and change it for the better.

Life is short. It’s your world. Time is ticking away. There is no reason to live with ‘what ifs’ and when your world needs to be fixed, it may call for some demolition.

So, look out. The countdown has begun. This world (my world) is going to go through a little destruction. Then…the work gloves go on and it’ll be time to get to work…

-Loyd Elmore

June 12th, 2016

I’ve decided to keep a blog about how I’m dealing with depression. I’m going to consider this a form of therapy. It might not help anybody else but it might help me.

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